off note...

“Bagaimana mencari lelaki yang sesuai untuk dijadikan teman hidup?” tanya Azura kepada rakan-rakannya, memulakan perbincangan pada petang yang amat panas itu. “Ha! Aku teringat nasib kakak aku. Sebelum kahwin teman lelakinya menjanjikan macam-macam. Dua tiga tahun lepas kahwin dah tak nampak batang hidung. Aku tak mahu kahwin, lelaki sekarang tak boleh pakai.” Lisa mengeluh dengan nada benci lelaki. “Ehh! Ada juga jenis yang balik ke rumah, tetapi hanya tonton TV, baca surat khabar dan merungut itu ini. Kalau lelaki macam itu jadi suami, memang lagi bagus tak balik rumah langsung!” Azlin mencelah, menghebatkan lagi analisa mereka tiga sekawan tentang lelaki.

“Issy! Takkan tak ada lelaki yang boleh dipercayai, penyayang, bertanggungjawab dan matang untuk kita jadikan teman hidup, untuk kita jadikan suami?” Azura kehairanan. “Ya, tentu ada. Akan tetapi jumlahnya sedikit dan sukar untuk ditemui. Kalau sekadar lelaki memang ada di sana sini. Namun lelaki yang memiliki ciri-ciri suami umpama yang awak cakap tu, susah nak cari.” Azlin menjelaskan hakikatnya. Lisa terus menyampuk: “Lagipun sambil kita mencari dan memilih, bagaimana kita hendak tahu selepas kahwin nanti dia akan OK, atau merudum kualitinya sebagai suami sekaligus lelaki?”

Saya agak yakin perbincangan atau persoalan di antara tiga sekawan di atas merupakan sesuatu yang lazim – atau setidak-tidaknya pernah – bermain-main di fikiran para pembaca sekalian. Iyya! Dalam rangka kita belajar menambah ilmu, dalam rangka kita beramal sebagai seorang muslimat, dalam rangka kita bercita-cita menjadi individu cemerlang, tentu kita juga merancang untuk mendirikan rumahtangga yang bahagia. Akan tetapi nisbah kebahagiaan rumahtangga mutakhir ini yang lebih condong kepada tidak bahagia dan penceraian menyebabkan ada di antara kita yang merasakan ia satu rancangan yang sukar untuk dicapai.

Namun saya yakin para pembaca sekalian bukanlah orang yang mudah berputus asa. Jangan mengeluh jangan merungut, sebaliknya berusahalah mencari ilmu tentang kehidupan berumahtangga. Ilmu ini bermula sejak awal, sejak langkah-langkah awal mencari pasangan yang sesuai. Berkenaan mencari pasangan ini, Rasulullah s.a.w. telah berpesan: Seorang wanita dinikahi kerana empat sebab: hartanya, keluarganya, kecantikannya dan agamanya. Maka pilihlah kerana agamanya, jika tidak kamu akan rugi. [Shahih al-Bukhari, no: 5090]

Meskipun hadis di atas ditujukan kepada lelaki tentang bagaimana hendak memilih calon isteri, ia juga boleh digunakan oleh wanita tentang bagaimana hendak memilih calon suami. Justeru berdasarkan hadis di atas, ciri yang perlu diberi prioriti ialah kadar dan nilai agama calon suami.

Mengukur Agama Seseorang?Senang dibaca dan senang disebut, tetapi tidak senang untuk dipraktikkan. Bagaimana hendak mengukur agama calon suami bagi menentukan dia benar-benar sesuai? Izinkan saya berkongsi beberapa tips pada kesempatan ini.

Agama calon suami tidak cukup sekadar Islam, tetapi hendaklah merupakan seorang muslim yang baik, yang shalih. Keshalihan tidak diukur dengan ibadah yang lazim umpama solat lima waktu dan puasa sebulan pada bulan Ramadhan sebab itu memang wajib. Namun ia diukur dengan ibadah yang sukar dilakukan, yang jarang-jarang dilakukan, yang dapat memberi isyarat tentang peranan calon apabila bergelar suami kelak.

Ibadah yang saya maksudkan ialah sikap calon suami terhadap ibubapanya, khasnya ibu. Jika anda mahukan suami yang boleh dipercayai, penyayang, bertanggungjawab dan matang, maka perhatikan sikap calon suami anda terhadap ahli keluarganya. Jika beliau merupakan orang yang dipercayai oleh ibubapanya, menyayangi lagi bertanggungjawab menjaga ibubapanya serta matang membuat keputusan yang melibatkan urusan keluarganya, maka semua itu merupakan isyarat yang amat kuat bahawa beliau juga akan menjadi suami yang bagus. Ini kerana berbuat baik kepada ibubapa merupakan ibadah yang amat tinggi nilainya, sekaligus menjadi alat pengukur yang tepat bagi kadar agama seseorang dan hubungannya dengan Allah s.w.t.. Rasulullah s.a.w. menekankan: Keredhaan Allah terletak pada keredhaan ibubapa manakala kemurkaan Allah terletak pada kemurkaan ibubapa. [Shahih Sunan al-Tirmizi, no: 1899] Dalam sebuah hadis lain: Seorang lelaki datang menemui Rasulullah s.a.w. dan bertanya: “Siapakah manusia yang paling berhak untuk aku layan dengan sebaik-baiknya?” Baginda menjawab: “Ibu kamu.” Dia bertanya lagi: “Kemudian siapa?” Baginda menjawab: “Ibu kamu.” Dia bertanya lagi: “Kemudian siapa?” Baginda menjawab: “Ibu kamu.” Dia bertanya lagi: “Kemudian siapa?” Baginda menjawab: “Ayah kamu.”[Shahih al-Bukhari, no: 5971]

Justeru di antara ibu dan bapa, calon suami hendaklah mengutamakan ibunya. Jika calon suami prihatin kepada ibunya, sentiasa sedia membantu ibunya, kerap berhubung dengan ibunya dan lazim mengeluarkan belanja untuk ibunya, bererti dia seorang anak yang shalih. Jika calon suami bersikap demikian terhadap ibunya, maka ia merupakan petanda yang besar bahawa beliau juga akan bersikap demikian kepada bakal isterinya.

Sebaliknya jika calon suami mengabaikan ibubapa, masih mengharapkan penjagaan ibubapa, kerap menderhakai mereka, maka dia seorang yang memiliki kadar agama yang rendah. Lebih buruk jika calon suami berani meninggikan suara kepada ibu tetapi tidak kepada ayah, bererti dia manusia yang memandang remeh kepada wanita. Lelaki seperti ini tidak patut dijadikan calon suami kerana terdapat kemungkinan yang amat besar dia juga akan bersikap seumpama terhadap bakal isteri dan keluarganya.

Mengukur Agama Sendiri.

Dalam rangka anda mengukur agama bakal suami, jangan lupa untuk mengukur agama diri sendiri. Di samping menjaga amal ibadah yang lazim umpama solat, puasa, membaca al-Qur’an, menutup aurat dan membatas interaksi dengan yang lelaki bukan mahram, jagalah juga hubungan anda dengan ibubapa. Berbuat baiklah kepada mereka, khasnya ibu. Berbuat baik bukan semata-mata untuk lulus penilaian calon suami tetapi sebagai ibadah kepada Allah s.w.t.


ps/ - got this from fatin, and sharing on my blog with all =)

10,000

if you just hopped in and reading the entry, you are helping me to reach 10,000 hits! yes!
10,000 hits ***

ps/- maybe i should have my own fan club, ***dreaming!
ps/- the baby is not mine =P

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**out of ideas

hi hi hi

the jack fruit story

it was a lovely day, a day full with malaysian food in dubai.

a. my boss bought butter scooth (wrong spelling, i know) for the morning's breakfast.
b. i bought manggo sweet and prawn roll for my colleague
c. the airport manager bought the jack fruit

and from there something funny happened...

the office boy as always has the duty to distribute food to all, and the last jack fruit came into the picture.

he gave to all, from the bosses and kulis...and after the round end, the office boy distrbute the boiled jack fruit seeds.

he offered to kak pah and me, she skipped and i took one...as i was about to put the seed into my mouth i looked at kak pah and asked....

"is this the seed from the eaten jack fruit?"

and kak pah just smiled and said " yes, but i dont know whose seed that you just ate..."

ps/ - maybe this is one of the team building activity...

from newspaper.... JOKE

There was a young couple who loved each other and planned to get married.They are scared to inform their parents thinking they might object their wishand decided to commit suicide.

Before committing suicide, they wrote a note explaining why they make the decision and applogize for the bold action.

And so, the next day the couple was found dead.

Their parents were shocked and went to the hospital to confirm the body of their children and read the notes left.

Suddenly they cried and the female's parents said "if only they could tell usand wait, they could be husband and wife..."

OK OK, it was not a joke from the way i write but

assumption is mother of srew up, and i think this is a joke

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i am back from the office from a week meeting in Kuala Lumpur.

last night flight from Kuala Lumpur to Dubai was delayed because a passenger took seat that was not hers and arguement took place.

the situation was fast recovered by the world's best cabin crew by diplomatically negotiate and reorganise passenger's seating.

well done, world's best cabin crew! ngeh!

ps/ - oohh i was the passenger on seat 31E =) haha

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i made a friend who reads mine blog anonymously
to the stranger, my schedule was really tight..

maybe we can meet up in july..
perhaps for a cup of coffee

ohh ohh,
i recomend you to proceed with your plan to come to dubai

leave me message date your planned date..
and i take my remaining annual leave..

urgh, im melting

the whole team had dinner hosted by concorde shah alam, it was buffet and i like food they have. now, the whole entry will be boring if i be writting about food and time the whole team had after a very tense meeting. So, i be writting about a girl who was the waitress at the restaurant. i do not know her, but one thing i cant forget is her smile with cute dimples.

gosh, for sure i was melting just to see her smile** thats it.

reflecting to the **instant crush i had, i just focus to one of the 4 principles to find a wife which is beauty. if im just chasing and choose a girl purely on beauty, i might end up with nobody as beauty is very subjective.

ps/- i do not lie, she is cute!

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i am thinking out loud to get engaged end of this year, IF i got a job in Malaysia.

Denied boarding +

Once forgotten, taken for granted

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever?"

Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."

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45 days to go...

Tiktok tiktok

Ps/ - is suppose to be on a 8hours flight to KUL for an interview. The company has bought ticket but had to decline due to work commitment here...hurmm maybe next time =)

typical

Nahh, not a racist entry, read through and you understand

I am a friend to many ladies, married, single, once married and others and to my surprise they “talk” about man in my presence. Its either they accept me as their ears (listening terminal) or they think I’m a gay (which is not true!) and not to my surprise I always hear the “typical malay guy” sentence.

Most of them generalize “typical malay guy” to be possessive, indecisive, and have I am always right attitude in relationship.

To my immature experience the generalization was being portrayed because:

1. They ladies have not experience be in relationship with other nationals or race and generalise their partner to be “typical malay guy”.

2. Their assumption come from “typical malay girl” who will not satisfy no to matter what the “typical malay guy” does.

3. Influenced by acted romance in Hollywood and Bollywood screens.

But, few points I must agree with the “typical malay guy” syndrome, as we intend to:

1. Control our partner because we are too passionate with our partner

2. Think that other “typical malay guy” will snatch her away

3. Take things for granted

So to all “typical malay guy” and “typical malay girl” lets try to improve and accept each other, the way they are.

Cheers,

Adik, for you! =P

long distance relationship

From single's point of view...


Distance is always see as taboo in relationship, mostly for youngster like me who has trust and truthful issue. Insecurity and external noise are 2 famous break up reasons for distance couples. I feel and understand how a person feels to be apart from loved one but my life in Dubai has opened a small snapshot about distance relationship for expats who are working abroad just to support family back home.

Majority populations in Dubai are from the South Asia countries like Pakistan, India and Philippines and most of them are single in Dubai. They scarify time with family to be away and earn a bit more and provide better living in own country.

However, not to ignore a bunch of people who get excited with new culture and forgets promises made before landed into the land of “dream”. Irony, expats from India and Pakistan are mostly male and from Philippines are female and because of the unique default match making condition, we can see “mix” marriage.

See, distance relationship is hard, no doubt but once a couple has gone through a distance relationship, they can manage their marriage no matter how the situation will be, God’s will..
So to long distance couple out there, trust your partner, ignore extra noise from other guys and girls.. write to each other, share a blog, emails, facebooking…well, just a suggestion

Someone actually told me that marriage is not merely on love, it is more on partnership… And I started to believe that

Ps/ - Adamaya episode 16 and 17, umrph

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Prove me wrong,
Prove me wrong that I am not arrogant or prove me wrong I did no sin
Prove me wrong that sun rises every morning and sets every evening
Prove me wrong that ocean as an end, prove me wrong that Santa does not exist
Just prove me wrong when I said

I did not know how you feel and better for us to be friends

Ps/ - They have their say and I cant stop to listen

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Adik,
Dont be selfish =)

in bahasa

sesungguhnya bahasa ibunda itu indah,
dan kerana itu kali ini ia dalam bahasa kita....

logikal tiada ruang dalam perhubungan
kerana logikal gagal, di tawan rasa
maka tiadalah pertimbangan
dan semua yang berlaku di luar kawalan

satu pagi tertanya
apa lagi yang di kejar
apa yang di kendung
mampukah pertahankan logika
dalam semua situasi

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Officially, Ad hanyalah ada seorang adik perempuan...muhahaha tapi saja lah kan gatal nak kumpul adik perempuan lagi....so gambar di atas adalah adik-adik perempuan tak rasmi...hahaha
owh owh 2 dah berpunya, sorang je solo...

nak detail boleh tinggalkan komen...

hahahahaha, kalau yall baca ni, abg ad wat free promotion...nanti semua akan berterima kasih juga!!

hahaha

worth sharing

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican fishing village. A tourist complimented the local fishermen on the quality of their fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. "Not very long." they answered in unison. "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" The fishermen explained that their small catches were sufficient to meet their needs and those of their families. "But what do you do with the rest of your time?" "We sleep late, fish a little, play with our children, and take siestas with our wives. In the evenings, we go into the village to see our friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. We have a full life. The tourist interrupted, "I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat." "And after that?" "With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico Cit y , Los Angeles , or even New York City ! [ From there you can direct your huge new enterprise." "How long would that take?" <> "Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years." replied the tourist. "And after that?" "Afterwards? Well my friend, that's when it gets really interesting, " answered the tourist, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!" "Millions? Really? And after that?" asked the fishermen. "After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends." "With all due respect sir, but that's exactly what we are doing now. So what's the point wasting twenty-five years?" asked the Mexicans. And the moral of this story is: Know where you're going in life.... you may already be there!!

adamaya

i am following adamaya series on youtube, and the only reason i can wait until the video to complete downloading is the actress... i like actor/actress who has spontaneous facial expression, real expression even though they were being filmed...

i am now at episode 4, part1.. the series has taught me that female can make themselves to learn to love someone... =)

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